Those eyes opposite...
1. What he thinks about you on a physical level
(Planet Today) Men respond to visual stimulation much more strongly than women. And here's a dirty little secret for you - they have what's called a "forbidden desire bank" - a set of mental images that men store in their minds and turn to when they get pleasure.
These images can be anything from entire scenes from movies to a fleeting glimpse of a passing woman's cleavage. Believe me, this is what men want most in women, but will never say. But nothing compares to reality, so if you are in a relationship with a man, even in the early stages, and you want to make him dependent on you, then your images will come first. It's not necessarily out of a desire to be "faithful" to you, just that those images and feelings will be the freshest and most intense for him.
So, what we're talking about here is that when he thinks of you, his first thought will be your appearance before anything else, like what you said during a conversation or something you did for him. The good news about this fact is twofold. First, it's not unique to your man; it's a universal trait. So there is no mystery as to what your man is thinking in this regard. And second, what could be easier than continuing to replenish his "desire bank" so that he never runs out of those images?
It's really important to make an effort to stay sexy in his eyes.
2. The beginning of your relationship matters
Think of it this way: in the early stages of the relationship - say, when you first kiss, or when you go on your first date, or when you first make love - you give him very, very strong images. After all, it probably took you a long time to look your best on that date.
And your first sexual experience with him is a veritable treasure trove of new sensations, so these will be cherished images that he'll keep for a long time.
3. The intermediate and most vulnerable stages of your relationship
Here you have been together for a while now. You've relaxed and are no longer making the kind of effort you were used to when you first tried to get him to want you and pay attention to you. Then here's a tough question for you: How do your images now relate to your images then?
So, what does he think of you when he looks at you now?
As we said at the beginning, he needs you to fulfill his need for a sexy woman. So make an effort, stay literally on top of him and keep him in check. And yes sometimes you don't want to look sexy or attractive when you're just hanging out at home. And chances are, he'll probably put his home clothes on as soon as possible, too.
But who said anything about being like that at home? That goes for, you know, dating, too. Whenever you go out together, find an extra moment to look like it's always your first date. Even if it's just an afternoon movie or you're meeting after a long day for a drink and a bite to eat together.
That first moment when he sees you is very powerful - even if he's already seen you that day. Even if he saw you just before you headed out to change! Every moment you appear in front of him after some absence is an opportunity to strike a visual blow. So, keep hitting! The easiest way to make him addicted to you is to make him crave that moment when he sees you and it takes his breath away every time. Now let's move away from the physical aspect.
4. What does he think of you as a potential girlfriend
If you asked a thousand men what they want from women, you'd get a lot of different answers - after all, they're not robots, they're men. But I bet you'd never guess what their most common trait is. Is it beauty? Intelligence? Humor?
They do say those things, yes. But the number one most common thing men look for in a woman is kindness. They actually use that word "kind." If they had to say it out loud, they'd probably use the word "nice," but when asked to make a list, "kind" comes first almost every time. So, with that said, here's another tough question for you: do you think that when your man thinks of you, he thinks of how kind you are?
There are many, many ways to show him that trait. And yet we tend to be incredibly lazy when it comes to showing him something. One aspect of this character trait is the kindness you show to others. Are you patient with your elderly grandmother? Do you let people pass in front of you in line? Are you quick to smooth over a potentially awkward situation?
In addition, there is the kindness that you show toward other people. You see, too often a woman in public is herself kind and easygoing, but the moment she finds herself in private, she begins to complain about everyone she meets, sometimes in a particularly unpleasant way. Men cannot tolerate this. First of all, it's just negative, and this particular kind of negativity is highly unattractive. Secondly, it makes you look like the worst hypocrite ever - it's all fake.
5. He wants to know how motivated you are.
The other most common thing men think about when they think about women is how motivated they are.
One aspect of this is your level of independence. He thinks about what you do in your life more often than he's passionate about it. And he wants to be proud of you. He wants to be able to look at your own personal trajectory and see the momentum. If he can see that momentum, he will think of you in a positive way.
If he sees you stagnating-that means you don't seem to have any interests, or that you've lost interest in things, or that you say you'll start something but then you don't follow through-he'll think of you negatively.
6. Always show him your best side.
So, take a moment to think about what you show him when it comes to your personal growth. Are you being practical about what you are capable of achieving? Do you let him know your progress on a project or goal? If you have to take a step back, how quickly can you recover and move forward again?
Sometimes a girl can make the mistake of going too far and just showing herself to be stupid.
What does stupid mean in this case? Well, it can mean a variety of things.
- If he constantly has to wait for you to try on 55 outfits and get your hair and makeup right, trust me - he won't think anything good of you.
- Unrealistic. It's fine to have hopes and dreams. But if you insist that your only goal is to be "rich and famous," then he just won't take you seriously enough to consider you suitable for commitment.
- Dramatic. Don't throw a tantrum like a four-year-old because of some imaginary gaffe or because you didn't get your way.
- Immaturity. If he's thinking about making a commitment to you, he's thinking about the future. If he feels that you still have a lot to do to grow up - that is, if you seem like a little girl who needs her daddy to do everything for her - he's not going to stick around until you decide to be an adult. He's going to move on and find a real woman.
7. He wants to see honesty in you
Men want honesty from women. This means that when men think about you, they think about whether or not they can trust you. So, you ask - what does he really think of you in this regard? Have you shown your man that he can trust you?
There are several ways you can do that, and it's important that you do. Remember that respecting him is extremely important. He needs to know that you respect him, understand, appreciate and love him. That's when he will respect you (automatically). By letting him know that he can trust you, you are taking care of these things. And fortunately, there are many ways to do this.
The first part of this is that he needs to know that you will never cheat on him. That means that if you find that he's not giving you the attention you think he deserves, the solution is NOT to throw yourself at other men and hope that he takes the bait.
That's not cool. And it's not fair. And it's disrespectful. He will lose interest in you and, of course, leave you, and that's not what you want...right?
If you feel like he's not paying enough attention to you, then think about why that is and then work on fixing the problems in your relationship.
8. Finally, he needs to be able to trust your social behavior
- Can he trust you to respect his family?
- Can he trust you to behave appropriately in the presence of his friends?
- Can he trust you to be okay with him doing things on his own?
- Can he trust you to handle a sensitive situation?
There are many ways, every day, to show him that he can trust you.
